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Father

Where is my mind? The Pixies asked the ultimate question in that famous song. Where IS my mind? And what is in it when I delve a bit further than the initial surface of daily routine? I’ve recently been getting interesting results from using pen and watercolour sketching and a semi-meditative state to discover the answer to this question.

My first step on the path to even exploring this was starting a mindfulness course a few years ago. I have subsequently taken the same course 4 times and am now beginning to explore further the many varieties of meditative techniques. Even just a few months of daily basic mindfulness meditation has given me a taste of how it feels to explore my own consciousness. I’m already far less skeptical than when I started, and the idea of meditating in my room is actually more of an attractive prospect than going out on the town! The concept is so ridiculously simple and obvious, I’m almost ashamed I haven’t just always done it. It’s unbelievable that modern life is so overwhelming that we have to re-teach ourselves just to stop; to actually listen to our own bodies and minds. Ironically for such a self-obsessed society, we don’t actually take much notice of our true internal voice.

Through this regular meditation I’ve had a number of interesting experiences, often dream-focused. I find that when I meditate I almost immediately return to a recent dream, I can’t change anything, so its not what they call ‘lucid dreaming’, but I’m in it, I can walk around it and explore it, and I get the same feelings and emotions I had when i was having it. My dreams now are different, they feel more like experiences than dreams and give me a strange sense of having been somewhere.

Quite by chance, I recently started doodling when I was focused on other things, as a stress release. I found that letting my instinct guide me resulted in some interesting imagery. As soon as I started regulating myself – ‘don’t put that line there’ etc. the pictures were far more dull and without the sense of freedom they had encompassed before. I tried to go back to the other technique and found that I could utilise the relaxation part of the mindfulness practice, but without switching off completely. Let the pen guide itself and do exactly what it wants. Don’t limit it, don’t think about what might look good or bad; basically don’t allow your conscious mind to impose the very limiting boundaries which are born of external influence.

The result is these images. I see these as an early experimentation phase, what might grow from further practice at this technique is yet to be discovered. It’s the first time I have not had to labour at a piece of art, the first time I haven’t had to ‘try’, haven’t had to worry about the end result. Releasing myself of that anxiety allows me to truly enjoy the process and I think that probably comes through in the imagery.

All works are pen and watercolour on paper and are for sale.

Visit my profile at Art Market Direct to purchase.

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Spending Tuesday night at the book club is not all it seems. Rather than squeezing around a friend’s coffee table to discuss the latest bestseller, I partake of a free glass of red and get settled to examine some naked bodies. The Book Club I am referring to is situated in the heart of Angel and is an exceedingly cool for cats drinking establishment, with original artworks for sale adorning the bare brick walls, Ping Pong tournaments and an ongoing series of workshops and talks. They claim to be “fusing boozing with brainpower”. Yes please.

The naked part is not compulsory (although a nudist bar in London could be quite fun, no?) and it is only the models who do actually strip down to their natural state. Life Drawing by Morris, which usually takes place twice a month, is held in the basement below the main venue. I had been to the Book Club only once, before I ventured here for this class. I arrived on a Friday night around 7pm for a catch up with some work colleagues. Mistake. The Book Club on a Friday night is not ‘catch up’ material. It is loud, heaving and buzzing. Great for a pre-weekend warm up and lovely and contemplative on a Monday or Tuesday when I arrive for the class. I had no idea it even had a downstairs.

But have a downstairs it certainly does. The basement space decor is a cross between luxurious burlesque and deserted house in the woods. The ceiling is covered with a carpet of light bulbs, giving it the essence of an amethyst-filled cave (or maybe that’s just me). Anyway, it’s a lovely space. All materials are included in the price, as is the large glass of wine, which succeeds in sweetening you up.

      

So, a few pieces of paper, some charcoal and pencils later and we’re ready to roll. The first time I came to this class my nerves were shaken by the initial 4 minute poses. 4 minutes!?? I’m more a ‘2 hours each night for a week to produce a drawing’ kinda gal. Which is exactly why this was so good for me. Short poses force you to work fast, concentrate harder, maybe even to choose different elements rather than the whole figure. It taught me to embrace simplicity. I learnt within the first 5 minutes to use strong lines and blocking to create the overall effect rather than small areas of tight shading as I would have at home. I thought it might be useful to detail the most important lessons I have discovered whilst doing these classes. The more experienced of you will be murmuring ‘pah, that’s obvious’, but even though I had taken art at A-Level and a subsequent art class, I had not before clarified in my own mind the basic, core techniques for drawing from life. This is as much for me as you!

1. Draw what you see. Sounds mind-numbingly obvious, I know, but honestly. Most people (including me) think they are drawing what they see, when in actual fact they are looking more at the paper in their lap and are drawing from the memory of what they have just seen. Once you become aware of this you can keep track of yourself. You shouldn’t look at the paper for more than, say,  2 seconds at a time. Brief glances are enough, you need to spend 99% of the time looking at what you are drawing.

Figure from Behind – charcoal on paper

2. Really look at what you are seeing. Most of us will be influenced by what we think is there, rather than what is actually there. If something looks strange and uneven our brain will automatically try and correct it and the representation will be wrong, because that is not what we are actually seeing. Everyone finds their own way of doing things, mine is just to pick a roughly central point in what I want to draw and to work outwards from there. Sometimes I have to really force myself to draw what I see, not what seems to look better on the paper. At this point you don’t know what will look better in the end, but I guarantee it will be when you focus on drawing what you see. Try it. Even just as an experiment one day.

Man in Mask – charcoal and pastel on paper

3. Use points at other parts of the body to get the right proportions. As you can see from my own drawings, I haven’t completely mastered this one yet. It’s a good way of doing things though. I often concentrate on drawing a leg, for example, then when I look at whether the line of the arm is parallel, or in line etc., it’s way off. I would recommend checking the lines of each part of the drawing in relation to the other elements every 5 minutes; and let’s not forget the old classic method of using your finger and a pencil to mark the size of something in front of you, by closing one eye and measuring the length on the body of the pencil. It is an invaluable tool.

Reclining Nude from Behind – charcoal on paper

4. Remember it doesn’t have to perfect. You are experimenting. Try different techniques, use materials you wouldn’t normally go near. Try some more detailed, and some just flowing lines; some just shading and some just line drawing. Climb out of your box and try something else.

Seated Figure – charcoal and pastel on paper

5. Any kind of meditation technique will help. Focus is your best friend here, especially as you are on a time limit for each pose. Every time I let my mind wander to tomorrow night’s plans, or dinner on Friday, I stop and realise I’ve begun to ignore rule number 1.

Reclining Nude – charcoal, pastel and pencil on paper

Standing Figure – charcoal, pastel and pencil on paper

Standing Figure#2 – charcoal, pastel and pencil on paper

Figure – charcoal and pencil on paper

I mentioned this class to a couple of friends and got the standard response of ‘nah, I can’t draw’. Aside from this irritatingly defeatist, and (usually incorrect!) attitude, there seems to be a definite pre-conception about life drawing. That you somehow have to audition to get in, or that you will be branded as crap and everyone will point and laugh. Not so. I have found that aside from some cheeky sideways glances (which are more out of curiosity than anything else), everyone is interested in their own work, not yours. The range of experience can sometimes be gauged; some people have clearly done this before and others not. It doesn’t matter. You pay your (very reasonable) £10, sit down, zen out and look at the body in ways you never would have done otherwise. I’m there.